We live so much of our lives pushed forward by these “if only” thoughts, and yet the itch remains. The pursuit of happiness becomes the source of our unhappiness.
Pursuing happiness requires a deeper understanding about your life tendencies, says The Ten Worlds coauthor Ash ElDifrawi. In their book, he and Lickerman identify 10 core beliefs about happiness. While you can move in and out of the beliefs, most of us gravitate toward one of them as being our truth, and we live in that “world.” Nine are delusions, while one is the true source of happiness. See if you recognize yourself.
Hell: The world of suffering. When trapped here we feel hopeless and helpless. The delusion in this world is that we’re powerless to end the suffering.
Hunger: The world of desire. People who live in this world are restless and have persistent yearning. The delusion in this world is that you have to get what you want to be happy.
Animality: The world of instinct. This world revolves around the present moment and satisfaction of our physical needs. The delusion is that happiness and pleasure are the same.
Anger: The world of ego. In this world, we are driven by a need to always be viewed in a positive light, which often causes us to feel contemptuous and jealous of others. The delusion in this world is that happiness comes from being better than everyone else.
Tranquility: The world of serenity. People who live in this world find comfort in the status quo, and shun variety and trying new things. The delusion is that to be happy we must avoid pain.
Rapture: The world of joy. This world feels exhilarating and full, but it’s hedonistic. The delusion is that happiness is dependent on specific attachments, such as money or things.
Learning: The world of mastery. In this world, you feel a relentless drive to learn and accomplish something that creates value and meaning. The delusion comes when you think happiness comes only through accomplishment.
Realization: The world of self-improvement. Here, you’re obsessed with self-examination and personal growth, but it can lead to self-absorption. The delusion is that you think you need to grow to be happy.
Compassion: The world of love. In this world, fulfillment comes from caring as much about the happiness of others as we do our own. While this sounds good, the delusion is that you believe in order to be happy, you must help others become happy, and that can foster resentment.
Enlightenment: The world of awe. The 10th world is the true path to happiness. We remain in a continual state of wonder at the sublime order and beauty of the universe.
I’m reading my empathy book and I’ve been sharing it over the past few days. Thanks for reading the posts, your comments are great!
In the last chapter of this book, the author talks about what NOT to say. So, I’m sharing.
You’re not an expert.
Unless you actually ARE an expert, whose expertise is being asked for, hearing news of someone’s crisis is not the time to offer up casual theories about their misfortune.
Doing this leads to two hurtful implications:
1. The event was preventable and/or deserved, because if this person had only done X or Y they would be fine
2. Your fact-finding mission is less about providing comfort than about “weeding out” the source of a problem – to make sure it doesn’t happen to you.
The meaning of life differs from man to man, from day to day, from hour to hour. What matters, therefore, is not the meaning of life in general but rather the specific meaning of a person’s life at a given moment. To put the question in general terms would be to the question posed to a chess champion: “Tell me, Master, what is the best move in the world?” There simply is no such thing as the best or even a good move apart from a particular situation in a game and the particular personality of one’s opponent. The same holds for human existence. One should not search for an abstract meaning of life. Everyone has his own specific vocation or mission in life to carry out a concrete assignment which demands fulfillment. Therein he cannot be replaced, nor can his life be repeated. Thus, everyone’s task is as unique as is his specific opportunity to implement it.
As each situation in life represents a challenge to man and presents a problem for him to solve, the question of the meaning of life may actually be reversed. Ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning of life is, but rather he must recognize that it is he who is asked. In a word, each man is questioned by life; and he can only answer to life by answering for his own life; to life he can only respond by being responsible.
365 Daily Meditations for On and Off the Mat: A Year in Hot Yoga
This page-a-day book gives you a daily story and question to meditate on. Great for journalers and hot yogis looking to deepen their practice!
What excuses can you overcome today?